You all have own circumstances. Our careers speak speak for themselves.
I feel compelled to offer a shout out to ALL smoke eaters, however you get to work. For me, I was a fire junkie. Drive big red trucks, kick in doors, leave a mess for someone to clean up. I was a mere child of 20 years. I never gave a thought to how my chosen profession affected others that loved me. Multiple fatalities? A family homeless? Crack babies with bread ties on umbilical cords? A 24 hour shift where you never get a break? A flashover that you notice just in time to pencil the ceiling and stumble out laughing, too hot to touch? Childs play! Your wife and kids wondering if when you walk out to your chosen “passion”, whether or not you’ll come home?
Different story.
We’ve lost a lot of brothers and sisters as of late. 19 in Prescott. Multiple smoke jumpers. Unknown structure fire friends.
To those still doing the job, I say live to fight another day. A tree, some scrub, an uninhabited structure, isn’t worth your life. Remember the most important part of the job: come home at the end of your shift. This goes out to all our EMS and LEO family as well.
To those that have the hardest job, those left behind wondering, I can only offer my perspective. There are honorable deaths. Support me when I go out. Back me up. Help me do my job of helping others. Be thankful when I come home. I’m doing something greater than me. If I should die in the commission of my duty, please love me and know I died doing what I love. Know I died the best death possible. In the act of protection of others.
To all, I offer only one last thought. Never let us leave with an angry last word. To all my brothers and sisters I offer the same. Never go back on shift with an “ugly” the last thought on your mind.
Go and do what you do. Never let an outstretched hand go ungrasped. Run to that smoke or that call because if everyone could do it, they wouldn’t need us.
To all I say do what you do. The world needs heros and “saviors”, but save yourself for those that need you the most. We can replant, rebuild, we can replace. WE CAN’T REPLACE YOU!
Godspeed to you all. We all get sleep because you have made the choice to unselfishly serve others. I wish I was still with you.
Always that others may live…
Fire, Life and The Rest 
Thank you myl2009smkj. This is a well thought out and considered response.
This gentleman is well known in the wild land community. I’ve yet to meet someone that does not respect him. Though I have never ridden a parachute to work nor have I scrambled up game trails with a chainsaw like our smoke jumping and wildland brothers and sisters, I have done the training and worked on many grass and brush fires. All threatening structures. I can’t say I enjoyed it, I respect and admire those who heed the call. I imagine part of my dislike comes from using structure gear on a ‘wildland interface’, meaning we often fought these fires in turnouts with Nomex hoods and structure rated helmets. At times even air packs and masks. Always in full length structure books (which I firmly believe were invented by Marque de Sade himself…probably the reason I spent so much time on my knees…much more comfortable than walking) We could go deeper than wildland can safely for one simple reason. We had 1 3/4 attack lines, sometimes 1000gpm deck guns, and unlimited water. We can put the wet stuff on the hot stuff like nobody’s business. We can lay waste to fire on an unimaginable scale with 400gpm out of 1 line. We had 8. I know our wildland guys would love to have that. And though we did have heavy timber, and had to call in air, we have the luxury of being able to drive in comfort and have response times of minutes not hours or days. Our wildland family doesn’t get any of those perks. We also had other shifts in reserve or mutual aid we could call on. Not so these brave souls.
I think almost daily of the Granite 19. My wife has a sticker honoring them and I have three honoring them on my truck. I was in Arizona, not too far away when the event. I could have lost a cherished nephew that day had he not chosen to fight fire that season. I have several close friends that knew many of them well.
There is a point here that ALL members of the Smokeating Community can agree on. You can be a great egg. Liked by all. But that is not respect. Respect is earned by applying your accurate knowledge judiciously. Wisdom. The responder is one of these. He, like, all great practitioners of the Slayers of the Dragon, is passionate in his quest for further knowledge. I respect his position.
I would love to have any officers or managers chime in here. I will share my experience on for the sake of dialogue.
When I was promoted to captain, I had a solid week of wicked nightmares. All of them me sending someone in to their death. Please understand all of the agencies I worked for, with the exception of a single admin captain, each captain was a combat captain. As often as not, I was as right there with then. But I never had a dream about my own loss of life.
Knowing that we have to weigh searching a structure for rescue and interior attack versus defensive is a tough one. As our responder mentioned, he weighs the risk/benefit (my words) to make a decision. As an IC, the same must be done. Now, for me at least, this becomes the difficult thing. Anybody that knows me, knows me to be analytical, often annoyingly so. At first I was slow to react. Then I started making quicker and quicker decisions. Wrong? Certainly. Right? I hope the balance falls here.
What changed for me? A Deputy Chief threatened to put a boot up my butt. “Captain the only action you cannot defend to the Mayor is inaction.” Color me corrected. So I did all I knew how to do. I studied more. I went to every class I could find. Paid for some on my own. Took advanced fire ground tactics. Fire Officer I&II. I had already gotten my Fire Instructor I&II. I advanced my medical skills beyond what my agency was licensed. I started teaching EMS at the local ATC. Took courses with doctors and nurses. Went to the university when they had renowned experts speaking. I discovered I had spent the department’s entire discretionary training budget on my own. I started working with the state fire training agency and the state EMS department. None of this was done to impress others. It was all so I could make the best possible decisions. I had lives in my hands.
Then one day it happened. Call at 0 dark 30. Must have been a bad one for me to remember. And I remember thinking, “I can handle this. I’m far from the most qualified or experienced officer, but the scene ain’t gonna be worse cuz I showed up.” The extra training worked. I was not given to hubris, but I had some confidence. And my men had confidence in me. I started making decisions that I could justify. Were there other choices? Sure. But they had the same chance of being right or wrong.
Allow me to use an object lesson. Please understand I was out of the city when the call came in. I had just finished an EMS class and had some champagne on board. I may have some small details wrong, but none that change the point. May of 2000. A call of “structure fire, heavy smoke and flame visible”. 2040hrs the call came. First engine in was an Engine Company with Batt. Chief. Second and third alarms were requested on arrival. Batt. gave immediate orders for an interior attack and search. A call made more urgently as a 16 yof had recounted that her brother was in there. An Lt. and a crew of two and an 1 3/4″ line deployed. Normally a two man job, but a rookie was on his first attack and the apparent likelihood of a survivor may have decided the three man attack. Structure is a split level, wood framed building with attached garage. As you enter the front door, garage is to left with additional living space. Right gets you up and to main living area. I can’t speak to the interior attack since I didn’t hear it from the Lt. As things progress, the heat becomes unbearable. (If you read the post about Dumb and Dumber, you will understand the ‘fatal funnel’ at work.) On exiting as the building was being laddered, the three got separated. The experienced firefighter went upstairs looking for an alternate escape. The three had been looking down a fatal funnel. Apparently, the fire raged on unchecked and now they were looking down a solid chimney of flame. I know the officer well. (In fact had the privilege of having his son on my company later. This is a soft spoken and very experienced officer. He is now a captain and well-liked and respected by all that serve with him.) He made a tough call and likely the only call. He pushed that rookie and himself through that wall of fire and through the front door. Though wearing all PPE, they both suffered burns, and were subsequently hospitalized, to return to full duties. Tragically, the firefighter that got separated died just within reach of the firefighters who laddered the building. I lost a cousin that day. A wife and 3 children lost their man.
Did that Batt. make a poor choice. I think all would agree no. He made the best choice with proper experience and skill. We all sign a check for our lives to our community. To give a life in attempt to save another is what we all do. Granite was a scar that will not heal so quickly. The loss of our comrade still hurts us. To know I wasn’t there makes it esp tough.
Now for the real tragedy. It didn’t have to happen. The 16 yof was lying. She had been upstairs with her boyfriend and to direct attention away from her, she told IC that her brother was there when she knew he wasn’t. In my opinion, the blood is on her hands. Any IC would have done the same.
So for all we learn a lesson. Is it worth it? Is a structure or tree or bear worth a life?, must be balanced with the job we swore to do. The best way to make good decisions is beforehand. Learn from the mistakes of others. Study. Take every opportunity to expand your knowledge. When you get there, you will have the tools and experience. May you always make the best decisions possible.
Thanks for the feedback.
LikeLike
Before taking risks, I pause, and ask myself “is it worth it”. Not always easy to do when time is of the essence. Don’t always do a good job of it but on several occasions it’s helped my judgement and led me to disengage or find an alternative route.
LikeLiked by 1 person